Thursday, December 6, 2007


i will just find work here and get on teh cruise ship after i hit 18 like my initial plan. and im having such an awesome time here ay.....honestly, it's been great, i'm loving it, i love the people and i've made heaps more friends which is good. like everyday something exciting happens and i dunno, its home, i love it. like i love waking up not knowing what each day will bring. i love that one night i hang out with all th young french and english kids, then the next night im having dinner with all the accountants and business people. its just nuts. nick broke up with his girlfriend and tried hitting on me on friday night. he was just being so perverted and gross. i wanted to throw up in his mouth. and that american fisherman is still wanting me, dickhead. actually he aint a dickhead, its just there's this look in his eye like if we ever were to have sex, he'd be a crazed animal. he will just literally, swear to God (ask my brother, ask anyone here), stand in one spot and look at me the whole time and ask me to dinner, ask if i want a drink, what am i doing durin the week, etc, its fucken nuts. its embarrasing when i am dancing and he will stand, not dance, on the floor and look at me. he isn't that bad looking ad he's really nice to me, but he's so predictable and doesn't interest me enough.

hard day

stopped smoking today officially and have decided to go all healthy again, but will continue drinking and taking drugs just not smoking, and eating right so that it evens out and compensates for the other chemicals. those herbal pills are in again and have been taking them, they are as good as ecstacy except i rekon the lows are worse. how sad is that. i resorted to herbs. haha. was on them friday night, got pulled over by the cops (jim's brother reese is back and i was with him) coz reese went the oppostie way in teh one way street, wanted to die of shame, got threatened to be put in jail and was also told to shut my fucken mouth, i quote. dumbass police. we all denied being drunk. didn't go out saturday coz i was so fucked. on sunday i went to church in the village, was the only non-nivan there, and it was a great service, really touching. newho was on msn and nina was on, told me she aint a virgin and she's been betting, clubbing, etc and i was like big fucken deal thats what im doing right now dip shit. and yes spoke to mikayla adn honey i dont think im coming back. they keep forgetting to send my medical or they'll delay something and im just like fuck tell u the truth, i dont give if i dont come back. i talked to my boss who is still eager for me to come but if i aint there by the 15th, then the job will be given to someone else. but you know what, if it aint meant to be, then it aint meant to be.